The Fiancé
by boosweirdtimeywimeystuff
Summary: Rather unexpected and equally as stupid sequel to The Boyfriend. Its just got Nick Fury in it this time, and some rather alarming choices for the Groom's suit. Also known as the one where Nicolas Fury was having a bad day and I learnt about the geography of South Dakota.


**This is a random little sequel to The Boyfriend. A certain someone (greendagger9900) gave me a few very interesting ideas for some companion pieces. This is one of them, the description is at the bottom. Thanks John :) xxx**

OoOoOoO

Nicholas Fury was having a bad day.

The Council was _still _on his ass for disobeying orders during the free for all in New York and for the recent issues in Gayville, South Dakota. Charming little town really. There was just a small problem concerning a skinny man in a pinstripe suit, a red head with a large mouth and a hell of a temper, and several small blobby... things, made out of fat terrorising the local geese. U.N.I.T was also intervening, and was creating a lot of political strife.

Phil was still in rehab, Maria Hill had a rare case of the bubonic plague (it had been discovered in Christchurch of all places and had then been bought over to the USA via a cargo ship which was filled to the brim with _lemons_ - what the hell? New Zealand didn't even _grow_ lemons!), Rogers had decimated the agency's supply of boxing bags and eventually broke into Stark's liquor cabinet (the one in the R&D 4th floor bathroom), and Stark himself had been taken to hospital for shock and then had to be carted back so that Banner could fix his boyfriend's malfunctioning Arc Reactor.

And on top of all that, Barton had decided that it would be a _wonderful_ idea to test out his new 'toys' - flaming projectiles which somehow turned into a bouquet of flowers when someone other than Clint tried to remove them from a target. The lab guys had no idea where he had gotten the arrows or how they changed, and Barton wasn't sharing. Two words: Incompetence and insubordination.

With the way things were going lately, that looked like S.H.I.E.L.D's new slogan. Preposterous.

And then there was the fact that Romanova had been off the grid for three days. Nick knew that she had been having a hard time recovering from fighting against her 'partner' (who was he kidding, the sexual tension between those two was so thick the only way you would be able to get through it would be with a bomb) but she was being exceedingly reclusive and it made no sense for any issues to catch up with her over a month after the ordeal. Besides, Barton was doing fine and he was the type to hold onto guilt like a child with a lollipop. He hadn't seen hide or hair of Romanova for two weeks, and she went completely M.I.A about an hour before Stark was taken to the hospital.

All in all, his day was pretty shit.

Nick had called the available Avengers (Stark, Banner, Rogers and Barton) to the Bridge to discuss living arrangements and to check for any reports about their missing team member, hearing a familiar and somewhat irritating drawl as he walked to the door leading to the Bridge while scanning the reports on Xavier's recent movements.

"...gonna want to plan it you know. She won't let you do anything she deems 'inappropriate'."

"Yes, well Stark, she's already a bridesmaid," said a feminine voice with a sigh. "And anyway, I'm hopeless at this sort of thing and so is Harry, so it works out well enough."

Nick's head jerked up from his reports.

He sped up and hurried to the Bridge. Sitting around the table were Stark and Banner, one leaning onto the other while Stark talked to Romanova. Natasha was sitting next to a well built man with black hair who was leaning over a bow with Barton and Rogers and seemed to be talking about improvements which could be made to the weapon.

"I was thinking Autumn," the black haired man said, not looking up from the bow. "You'd look lovely with reds and oranges Nate."

"Picked out a colour theme yet Haz?" asked Barton.

"Gold and white. It would go great with Nate's hair."

"Romanov!" barked Fury. "Where the hell have you been? And who's this?" he said, gesturing to the man named 'Haz'.

Natasha didn't move from her chair. "I was in Scotland. And this is my fiancé. "

Haz looked up at Nick and grinned, giving the older man a full view of his previously hidden face. "Hello mate! Nice to see you again! You're looking a little worse for wear, what did I tell you about getting into knife fights over Lindt Chocolate?"

At the sight of the man's face Fury froze. "Shit. You're still alive?" he asked the now recognisable face of Harry Potter. He looked much the same as he did when they had met in 1999, with a few extra scars and a complete loss of his previous puppy fat.

"Indeed-o Nicky. Still kickin', I reckon Nate might be a bit angry if I let some Dark Lord come along and rip me to shreds. I seem to be doing better in that department than you," Harry commented, looking the Director up and down.

Nick shifted uncomfortably. "What are you doing here?"

Harry shrugged. "Nate wanted to show me where she worked, and I missed Clint, so I came in for a visit. Had no idea you were still in charge though, I thought you would have gotten out of the business after that stint in Peru. Magnus is still pretty pissed at you."

Nick cleared his throat. "Yes, well... I stay out of Brooklyn."

Harry nodded. "Always a good idea. Those locals will never view wind chimes the same way again," he said wistfully.

"Oi!" shouted Tony, breaking Harry out of his reverie. "Pepper's going to want at least three months to help plan this with you, so if you want this wedding in the Fall, we need to get planning."

"Alright then. Pepper, Luna, Maria, Ginny and Hermione as bridesmaids, Ron and Clint as joint best men, and the rest of you can be in the entourage. Clint's also giving Nate away," Harry said decisively.

"Lovely," Tony said, producing a tablet from somewhere under the table, fingers poised to type notes. "Gold and white colour theme, outside or in?"

"Outside," Natasha decided. "If I walked into a church I'd go up in flames."

Steve looked scandalised and Clint chucked. "On that note, Tash can't wear white. Gold would suit her better anyway."

"Black suits with white shirts and gold ties for the men."

"No, no, no, we can't do that. The suits should be all gold, then we -"

"Hell no! I'm not dressing like some sort of insane, sparkly, Hunger Games contestant!"

"Well it would be way more original than -"

"SHUT UP!" Fury roared. "Why the hell are you even discussing this here? This is a place for important conferences and Council meetings! YOU DON'T GO PLANNING A WEDDING ON THE BRIDGE OF A MULTI-BILLION DOLLAR FLYING WARSHIP!"

"Well _sorry_," Harry said, affronted. "But we figure that this would be the best place to plan for a wedding that has to be rushed."

"How?" growled Fury. "How the hell is this a good place?"

"Well for starters everyone's here-"

"Plus there's free wi-fi-"

"And it irritates you-"

"And we can use all of S.H.I.E.L.D-"

"And Tony's-"

"Tech to book a great band-"

"The best flowers-"

"Get that ultrasound we've been waiting for-"

"Avoid the wizarding media-"

"WAIT!"

The Avengers and Harry turned to face a pale Nick Fury.

"Yes?" Harry asked.

"Did... did you say ul-ultra..."

"Ultrasound, yes."

Fury cleared his throat. "Please tell me its because someone got injured."

"Of course not!" Clint said cheerfully. "Its 'cause Tasha's pregnant!"

_Shit._

OoOoOoO

**I had the strange urge to end with:**

**'"And this is my fiancé."**

** Fury fainted.'**

**Instead I decided a swear word would be appropriate.**

**Gayville, South Dakota, USA - I kid you not. Look on Google Maps, midget little town. Looks quite nice.**

**greendagger9900's idea: Fury walks into the room to brief Tony and Bruce on something while Nat and Harry are there and chaos ensues as Fury walks in on them telling the two about their upcoming wedding plans (this is a continuation of the one shot).**

**This came after a little conversation we had about my wish to make Fury fall off of the Helicarrier in shock. And I mean off, over, and down, down, down...**

**P.S: You just read 4 pages of crap. Congratulations, I hope you've enjoyed your day. xxx**


End file.
